Happy Humpday from a very cloudy and cold Northern Italy. Yesterday night it hailed here in Bergamo; lately Italy has been experiencing a climate similar to that of the tropics- super high humidity, hot days and storm-ridden nights. Anyways, I'm not complaining because the air conditioning is still broken in my car and when it rains, everything cools down and I can actually make it home without having to change my entire outfit after (Italy and India are the only two places I've literally sweat through my clothes while doing nothing!). My post today is just a little musing on the difference between honeymoon destinations if you're North American vs. Italian. I just noticed that of course, geography plays a part and everyone wants their luna di miele to be an extra special trip so the tendency is to go as far away as possible. For Italians, that often means the USA, Mexico, and the Caribbean. Some also do choose Africa or Asia as well. One of the most "classic" honeymoon trips for young Italians is actually to do a cross-USA road trip starting from New York City and ending up in Los Angeles. Then they usually tag on some beach time at the end either in Hawaii or Mexico or the Caribbean. What an epic trip eh?! Sometimes I wish I were Italian and seeing America for the first time in this way, I just have the impression that it must truly be the trip of a lifetime, everything would seem so different and foreign if you were seeing it with fresh eyes. In contrast, North Americans often choose romantic Europe, especially Italy, for a honeymoon, although we do share a mutual love of Hawaii as well. Massi and I have been beyond fortunate to have travelled to many typical honeymooner destinations together including Hawaii, Cuba, and Mexico and then well, we live in Italy so in fact, had a very difficult time in choosing something that would impart a certain sensation of fascination and wonder to a trip that is supposed to be both romantic and 'once in a lifetime'. My initial idea was actually DisneyWorld because our first "international" trip together was DisneyLand (approximately three months after meeting each other!) and I thought it could be a perfect way to make everything come full circle, plus, we adore being kids and had an absolute blast in Anaheim. However, the only problem with this idea was that for us, it couldn't really be classified as the trip of a lifetime. So after much debate and discussion, we finally confirmed our honeymoon over the weekend. Any guesses from the photo where we are headed? 

If you're new here, you might want to catch up with our backstory here.

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Today's blog post is actually just a checklist of things that need to be done prior to getting married in Italy. It is the list that was given to me by Massi's sister to help us keep in mind the numerous amount of tasks to be considered prior to the big day. I've included it in both her original version in Italian with my notes in English. Hope that it's  helpful to some of you! Especially if you're a non-Italian planning a wedding to an Italian...there were alot of aspects that are traditional to weddings here that I had absolutely no clue about! Of course, in the end, it's your day so you can organize it and include/exclude whatever you like but the following is a list that would apply to a very traditional (also, religious- Roman Catholic) wedding day:

N.B. If you're not Italian, you will also need to check with your native country (call the Embassy in Italy) to see what documents you require in order to get the civil marriage certificate and you cannot leave this until the last moment! 

Lista x Matrimonio/To-Do List for the Wedding Ceremony: 

- Lista nozze o comunque far sapere agli invitati cosa volete che vi regalino/Complete a wedding registry or at the very least, you need to tell people what you would like to be gifted for the wedding 

- Scelta delle fedi. Conta che di solito richiedono almeno 3 settimane per procurarvele e  incidere nome e data. Ci sono diversi modelli, grandezze e bombature, i tipi classici sono 3./Choosing rings. This typically requires at least 3 weeks from start to finish to have them ordered and inscribed with names. There are different styles that vary according to width and shape but there are three classic models that most people choose. *This is different from North America because Italians still go very classic (as in, a gold band) for wedding rings. They don't necessarily have matching "sets" with band that matches your engagement ring, for example. 

- Honeymoon, decidere, organizzare, prenotare/Decide and book the honeymoon. 

- Noleggio o scelta auto sposi/Choose and rent the newlywed car. *Again, different from North America where we might use a limo. Here, you usually rent a very particular kind of car whether it's a luxury car or an antique one! 

Messa: Dovete decidere/For the Mass (if you're having a religious ceremony): 

•preghiere/prayers 

•chi legge cosa/who will read what 

•i canti/hymns

•quale versione della promessa inserire (io prendo te come legittimo sposo.... Ci sono varie versioni)/which vows you want to use as there are various versions

•offertorio, dovete decidere chi e cosa porterá degli oggetti all'altare. Ed eventualmente trovare gli oggetti/for offerings to the church, you need to decide what to bring to the altar and who will bring them and eventually find and purchase these objects

•Tutto questo va scritto e impaginato nel libretto della messa/all of this then needs to be assembled into the mass program; if you're organizing a bilingual/bicultural wedding like we did you will also need to have both languages in the program

Bomboniere/Party Favors: 

•per i genitori/a specific gift for each set of parents
•per i testimoni/for your witnesses 
•per gli invitati al pranzo/for all-day guests (coming to the ceremony and the reception) 
•per gli invitati la sera (di soluto solo il sacchetto di confetti)/for those just coming to the evening portion (usually people give a little bag of confetti)

Inviti/Invitations: 

•x il pranzo/for the reception
•x la sera/for those just being invited to the dance portion 

Other (Miscellaneous): 

-Bigliettini da inserire nei sacchettini dei confetti/thank you cards to put inside the little bags of confetti 

-Scelta musica in chiesa/music for the church 

-Scelta musica ristorante (controlla chi deve preoccuparsi della SIAE e dovrai portare il documento che accerta che la siae sia stata pagata al ristorante)/music for the restaurant (and you need to get a "music license" from SIAE that allows you to have live music/a DJ at the venue; this can now be done online instead of going to the SIAE office 

-Organizzazione giochi/scherzi/animazione al ristorante ed eventualmente fuori dalla chiesa/organization of wedding games and entertainment during the dance and also, during the exit from the church 

-Fotografo/photographer

-Fiorista/florist; you will need flowers for...
•fiori chiesa/the church
•bouquet sposa/the bouquet
•auto/the car 

- Parrucchiere/hair and makeup 

-Cuscino fedi/cushion for the wedding rings

- Damigelle o paggetti/attendants, flowergirls, ringbearers etc. 

-Menu: Di solito é da confermare il numero di invitati e richieste speciali (bambini, vegetariani, vegani, allergie...)/the menu at the restaurant usually requires confirmation for numbers and number of special meals required

- Pensare all'offerta da dare x la chiesa/think about the donation to make to the church 

- Comprare/preparare ceste con fiocchi bianchi x le auto/buy and prepare baskets with white bows for the cars of wedding guests 

-Segnaposti tavoli: Decidere i nomi dei tavoli ed eventualmente la grafica/Placeholders: Decide on table names and any necessary graphics/illustrations you want

-Suddivisione tavolate. Chi mettere a che tavolo./Table organization and where each guest will sit

-Centrotavola: Alcuni ristoranti ci pensano loro, altri devi fare tu. Se questo é il caso devi parlare col tuo fiorista/The centerpieces at each table (some restaurants do this for you, others you need to ask the florist to do)

-Confetti bianchi sciolti da portare in giro ai vicini di casa/ in ufficio/white confetti to take to your neighbors and to your co-workers

-Pensare a dove far pernottare gli invitati- trasporto a ristorante/how to get your guests from the church to the restaurant and back to their hotels *applies if you are having guests come from overseas

The photos used in this post were from the wedding of Massi's best friend.

Cazzo mene oggi è vene! (A version of "TGIF" that my colleagues from the Crema area taught me). So I wanted to do a very brief post on moving and living in Italy, legally of course. I have written similar related posts here which will take you to Pink Pangea's site where I wrote about visa options as a Foreign Correspondent. I'm going to keep this succinct and to the point because if one avenue interests you, then you can absolutely just Google the crap out of it and some other bloggers like Rick Zullo and Georgette of "Girl in Florence" and Sara of Ms. Adventures in Italy have quite alot of posts regarding the specifics. So basically, let's pretend you are a normal, non-EU passport-holding person wanting to move to Italy...here are your options in no particular order: 

1. Get your hands on an Italian citizen and marry them: this is especially effective if you actually have an Italian significant other, might be a bit difficult if you're starting from zero and slightly even more so if you are already married to someone else. Jokes guys, but all that aside, this is your easiest route because once you are married you can pop on over and apply for a permesso for family matters and you're allowed to work legally right away. 

2. Hit the books: probably the second easiest option is a study visa. You can be granted a study visa fairly easily but you usually need to be enrolled in an accredited course (for example, a program at a university) and you will be able to live in Italy for the duration of the course. Obviously, the most effective thing would be to do a full degree, Masters, or PhD. You are allowed to work part-time with a student visa (I believe around 20 hours a week). Another plus of having a student visa is that if you complete your degree at an Italian university (ie: you graduate from an Italian university), you can ask for a permesso for an "attesa di occupazione" which gives you an extra year on top of your study visa after you've graduated to essentially "find a job". 

3. Look into your ancestry: well you can't go too far back but if you happen to have Italian roots, you may want to investigate the possibility of applying for Italian citizenship. I don't know alot on this process but I know it requires digging up alot of documents to prove your Italian blood and unfortunately alot of first and second generation Italians born abroad had parents that were forced to renounce their Italian citizenship. Nowadays, for example, Canada and Italy allow you to have both citizenships but back in the day that wasn't the case. So if your family members "gave up" their Italian passport when they emigrated, it's likely you don't have the right to it either. The only other thing I know about this is that it is a VERY long drawn-out process, it can literally take years. Because of the right of mobility between EU member countries, I suppose you don't even necessarily need to have Italian roots but if you have the right to citizenship of ANY EU country you could then move to Italy after. 

4. Get a transfer from your current employer: if you work for a company with international branches, you're in luck, because you can always ask for an internal transfer to the Italy offices! This works wonders and the company does all of the heavy-lifting in terms of work visa etc. Plus, everyone I've known that has done this has continued to be paid in the currency of their original job and at the same salary plus usually a monthly stipend for food and accommodation so all kinds of yes here. 

5. Win the lottery: if you can afford not to work, you can apply to be an elective resident of Italy, or heck if you can afford not to work I suppose you can be an elective resident of the entire freaking world eh?! But unfortunately for this, you are required to show bank statements that prove you can support yourself in a foreign country without working and some people have told me that the number needs to be quite high, however many retired couples will use this route. 

6. Win a "different" type of lottery: by this I mean, apply for a work visa. And by apply for a work visa, this actually means you need to find an Italian company willing to apply ON YOUR BEHALF. Just as with all work permits all over the world, normally an Italy-based company will need to "sponsor" you and 90% of the paperwork needs to be done by them. There are different kinds of work visas depending on your education background or whether you want to work from home or be entrepreneurial or head-up a startup. 

7. *Go on a working holiday: I put a little star next to this one because the working holiday option is only applicable to certain countries who have this agreement with Italy. Some that I know off the top of my head are Canada, Australia, and New Zealand (?). For example, if you're American and reading this, it's unfortunately not available to you. Also, you need to be less than 35 years of age and show a certain amount of money in the bank. But besides that, it's a very simple visa to apply for and it allows you to live and work in Italy for a year (holiday for six months and work for six months to be exact). 

Alright, I think that about does it. Like I said, there is a world of information out there about each specific process but the common thread between all of them is they require TIME and PREPARATION. So if you're serious about the move, start planning and researching yesterday. 


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 So some of you who perhaps follow my Facebook page might know that I’m getting married here in Italy in September. I wanted to write a little bit about what it’s been like planning and prepping for a bi-cultural Italian/Canadian wedding. (Photos above are from my Bachelorette party in Canada this past spring/summer!). 
 
First off, we were very late getting started and I don’t recommend doing this. The usual “rule” of starting a year before is a good one to abide by, also because Italians love getting married on Saturdays and we quickly realized that all the Saturdays were already reserved at on-demand locations when we started inquiring. That was fine by us though since half the guests are coming from Canada and will be on vacation anyways, having a wedding mid-week was actually an acceptable option and we ended up choosing a Thursday. The restaurant is probably the most important thing to book early, then the church if you’re doing a religious ceremony. Keep in mind that if you’re wanting to get married in the church, you absolutely must do the marriage course which is typically offered at very specific times during the year and not more than twice a year in each parish. I’m Catholic and so didn’t have any issues (so far) with participating in the course and organizing the church ceremony so unfortunately I don’t have any insight with regards to options if you are of a different denomination. The course will last one to two months depending on how often you attend each week. We went on Fridays for a little more than three hours for two months.
 
After having attended the preparation course, you then have a whole bunch of fun bureaucracy to deal with as you need to present a myriad of documents to your comune of residence so that they are then able to “publish” your upcoming marriage on the town “bulletin board”. Being Canadian, one of the documents I had to present was an official testament (a nulla osta)  from the Embassy of Canada stating that I have never been married in Canada and thus, there is nothing ‘impeding’ a marriage in Italy. Post-publication of your marriage, you are then required to take part in private interviews with a priest where you are asked a variety of questions separate from your partner. Apparently the documentation is then forwarded to Rome and also kept on file at your church forevermore. We haven’t yet done our interview part yet, it’s the last bit that we’re missing in this never-ending process. So basically in summary, as you can probably tell, just the simple legalities of getting married (especially if you’re doing a religious ceremony) are almost enough to make you not want to get married! It’s then made slightly more difficult if you’re not an Italian citizen and marrying one – our trip to Rome was actually to go to the Embassy of Canada to pick-up one of the obligatory documents, for example.  I’ve actually begun to think that this is a brilliant tactic devised by the Italians to filter out who is serious and actually marrying for love versus those marrying for other, not so noble reasons!